We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
