This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
