what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
