Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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