if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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