Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize