Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
