I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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