u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
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