FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize