the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
