Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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