halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
