Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
im about as happy as oj after his trial
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize