i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
The feeling are messing with the penis
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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