I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
