Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
