you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
