I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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