What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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