he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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