If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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