I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
