I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
