You can't motorboat a personality
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
