she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Two words: blizzard sex
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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