her vagine was all disorganized.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
