How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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