he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
