I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize