Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
