okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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