He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
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