I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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