How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
