It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize