as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
