This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize