you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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