You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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