If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
