gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
