Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
please come you make the beer taste better
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
