I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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