Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
