Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She's the barista slut.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
