she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize