These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize