pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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