didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
