And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
