I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
