This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
All the doctor said was why
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
