It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
